poems gigs misc. why don't you EMdC home
The One

Oh no,
I've lost it
I've lost it
but I had it
I had it
I know cos
I was counting
calculate ...

but then
I forgot.

and then it got good
and just for a while
you could hear it all
not just you
but everyone
layers on layers
the mix just right
everyone playing
all adding up
this amazing sound
and a feeling
like rising
touching the peak
of the world's
best wave
and balancing,
seeing the whole sea
and the land
and the sky
and kissing the cusp
of the bright salt swell
hearing its rush
with echoes below
and songs of the fish
and the sea bed moan
and everything's there
you're right at the heart
playing along
just playing

then it all came apart
must have got too much
I flapped and I floundered
and I felt my hands fail
go hot, go cold, go numb,
go wrong all fingers and thumbs
when I panicked
it sounded so bad
everything blaring
they're still playing
but I've lost it
lost where the one is
I could get back if I just knew
where the one was
where's the one?

so you try and find it, looking about
straining, frowning, feeling uneasy, out of place
with the loop of what you learned
that safety in numbered beats
is reeling and spinning
like fake ticker-tape skimming
superimposed on a flat screen
where your sea of sound
that rhythmic revelation
plays on and on,
distorted, senseless
badly coloured bland
abstract and pointless

oh why did I stop?
why can't they just stop?
stop the rhythm
I wanna get back on

but it doesn't stop
not just like that
not regular
like clockwork
or straight street trams
for neat and tidy queues
of weary, watch-wound
citizens to sit from A to B
more like an old but overhauled
painted bright Brazilian bus
packed with all life
that knows where it's been
and comes when it comes
not quite when they say it comes
a while after you see it come
soon after you hear it come
the moment that you feel it come
you can trust the travelling time

so shut your eyes
if you feel that helps
capture moments of flow
underneath your skin

it's a movement to sense
something rounded to hear
an energy of endless
lines and lights

where's the beginning
and the end of that?
don't let some beats
of a bar bind you down

where's the one?
what one?
fuck the one!
don't give me one

but yes but no
but yes there is
it starts somewhere
for people to fit in
there must be
a scheme of things
there's got to be a point

Well, if that's
what you think
it's what you think
that's where you're at

so go on, take it
from there
whatever way
we'll find a way

you want the one?
what one?
fuck the one!
but there it is

somewhere hidden
in your beats
the way you measure
out your eights

you want the one?
what one?
fuck the one!
but there it is

encased in
helpful little halves and
quarters, boxes
dots & xes

you want the one?
what one?
fuck the one!
but there it is

in the
grounded fibre of
falling feet as they
keep in touch with up
it's within the hips
whose steady swing
is the stroke
of the in between

you want the one?
what one?
fuck the one!
but there it is

get a grip on the beat
like that if you like
or you can sing it you can say it
make words when you play it

I like to go sailing in a boat
I like to go sailing in a boat
but I do not like to watch the telly
but I do not like to watch the telly

or breathe the rhythm from your soul
make connections like a friend
from your hands to the drum
skin that slaps and says hello

whatever helps
whatever helps
to get in & get beyond
into feeling it being it
up on the wave
where there's no start
no end
no one - no one
but you
get it full on &
take it together
get existential
just get high
on the ride
of the big big rhythm

                                                                 I know I know
                                                       I get it I've got it
                                             I've got it I get it
                                      I want the one?
                              what one?
                   fuck the one!
        but there it is
there it is!

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